Happy #5

"Cut out violent or depressing media"

This one makes sense right? This advice is as old as the pyramids. Whatever you are putting in will most likely come out. So watch what you are putting in. Solomon put it this way, "Guard your thoughts, for they are the source of true life".

This also works from a positive perspective, how many times am I more cynical, aggressive, empathetic after watching something like Die Hard 4? (coincidentally, Zac and my first movie date, my choice). It isn't just movies, it's reading the news (mostly all horrible), the lyrics of the songs you choose to listen to and the type of books you read.  

When I find myself getting down, or I realize I am not the being person I want to be, I turn to my old favourites: Amelie, Roman Holiday, Sahara, children's novels and tintin comics. Anything light-hearted that reflects the values I hold and shows people demonstrating behaviour that I want to emulate. Kindness, imagination, creativity, empathy, bravery, humility. 

Sorry John McClane, you may handle a gun well, and it's funny when you say "yippee-kiyay-mother****er" to show the baddies who's boss. But that is not what I want to be like. So I shan't be watching much of you in the near future!

Aside from the obvious gender difference, being like John McClane is just. No..

I would rather be like Amelie, skipping stone on Canal Saint-Martin to gather my thoughts.

Happy #6

"Go Slower. Do Less. Talk less on the phone."

same / same

Who says the phone has to be picked up?

I have to admit, now that I am on holidays (from studying) I am doing this more and more. It must be a family thing, my mum lost her phone for four days last week and found it in time to get a message from a friend who travelled into town and was asking to stay at our house. This gave us 10 minutes to clean up before she got there, but it was a really nice, albeit accidental, surprise!

Who says it all needs to be done today?

My task list was longer than my screen this morning. It fits in the screen now, but it certainly isn't done. Some of the things can wait, but I like making a specific time to deal with them, rather than just changing the 'due date' willy-nilly. I find this one difficult..

Excerpt from a conversation today:

"Clare, it's 6pm, we are going home and you are not taking that work with you! Take it out of your bag!"

"It needs to be done. Besides, YOU take work home ALL THE TIME"

"But it's the Christmas production I need... oh darn"

Who says you have to rush?

Long slow walks. I love them! Zac rushes around like a mad thing, getting to where he needs to go in the most efficient time possible. This is a very useful skill I do not possess. I cannot walk fast, I walk sloooooowww and while I would like to be able to get from A to B with minimum time spent, when I am trying to relax why do I need to rush?

'nuff said.

brb

Be Right Back

my most favourite of all the leet internet slang. i used it so often when chatting on msn as a youngster.. i always got too distracted by what was happening around that i would buzz away and return later. it was only polite to say "brb". 

be right back.. 

..after i finish what is distracting me from posting (i do really want to, i swear)

..after i get over these last hurdles

..after this season ends

..after this chapter of my life closes

..after i stop using lame cliches

(after exams)

and just to motivate me. i am looking forward to:

• covering my new books, now totaling 12
  
• reading novels, particularly chocolat
  
• reading christian stuff and not caring about whether it is hermeneutically sound
  
• flying outside of western australia for the first time (austria and italy doesn't count if you have never even been to the other side of your own country)
  
• post-christmas shopping. i plan to buy dresses. lots of dresses.
  
• meeting zac's extended family
  
• resting
  
• hanging out with the girls
  
• watching to catch a thief, walk the line, priceless, sabrina, roman holiday, v for vendetta, amelie, chocolat, australia, quantam of solace, casablanca
  
• laughing at my nutty family and their nutty christmas tree decorations (rubber duck tree toppers, cd baubles anyone?!)
  
• sneaking into the pine forest and cutting down said christmas tree
  
• escaping the slightly scary Large Family Gathering at christmas
  
• youth camp
• spending time with zac
• snorkeling over coral
• twilight tennis with zac, sam, steph and ryan
• trying out new recipes
• no uni fees for 8 whole weeks
• no uni for 8 whole weeks
• star gazing
• time to dream about the future again

but only if i leave now and work HARD.

this boy

this boy surprised me so well today that I had adrenaline running through my body and my hands started shaking.

this boy helps me commit the sin of lust every so often.

this boy broke a year long spell where I didn't cry once.

this boy is wonderful. charming. wholesome. hard working. strong. humble.

Happy #7

"Spend a whole day playing truant"

Australians are good at this one. A "sickie" is a time honoured tradition, usually coinciding with 35C days, easterly winds and a desire to hit the beach. Or the opposite, it is too damn cold to get out of bed and that book on the shelf looks mighty tempting.

Nothing matches the naughty feeling you get when it is late at night and you say to yourself "screw it!" You wake up the next day and immediately call your boss, hoping that your morning rasp will be mistaken for your highly infectious, ebola-like, dysenteric 'flu.

Playing truant. An art form and a joy. Just do it.

Bondi: 1884. Probably a severe outbreak of Mondayitis.

Bondi: 2007. Similar symptoms.

PS. Apparently, sickies cost the Australian economy $10 billion per year - about 10 days per person. So if anyone questions the validity of your illness, say you are taking care of your mental health. Just don't get caught out shopping.....

Happy #8

"Don't keep delaying pleasure"

Sometimes we have a notion to keep denying the things that make us happy. For me: 

I love sitting in a park

Reading a novel 

Baking 

Pottering around in the garden

I find I keep putting off these things because I feel like I should be doing study, or working. The only reason I feel like this is because I know that there is just so much that can be done that is more productive.

So how does this one make you happy? Well, like the other things we have said, it is pretty simple. Play around with your hobby, take the weekend off, take a road trip, have sex, read a book or take care of your garden. Do the things you enjoy and don't put them off 'just because', funnily enough you will start to feel happier doing things you enjoy.

Happy #9

"If you hate your job. See a careers counsellor."

So many people stay in jobs they hate for waaaayyyy too long.I remember my first job was a Mortgage Administrator! That is so hilarious, I have long joked that I have dyscalculia (number blindness) - I see a page of numbers and it is blurry, I can't read it, sometimes the entire page just looks blank! All in all, it really wasn't a good fit for me..

I have had 5 different jobs in the last couple of years. A cook, a Visual Art person at church, an assistant to the Events Manager at church, Young Adults pastor and now I'm a Youth pastor.

I have to admit I hated those events jobs. When I started at church, I was pretty clueless as to what fitted me (in terms of career) but I learnt quickly! It feels like I've been whittling away at my career, getting closer to what suits me best, makes me happy and fits with who God has made me to be. I have a this sense whenever I change my job. 

So, if you hate your job, hate getting up in the morning (most mornings) and spend the entire work day on facebook.. maybe you need a change. 

Be kind to yourself. Let me remind you that are not a slave to work. 

Here are some questions I ask myself when I'm thinking about my job:

When I feel really useful, what am I usually doing?

I feel so alive when I ____________ (fill in the blank)

Do I have some aspects of the above in my current job?

Am I happy with that level of feeling useful/feeling alive?

Happy #10

"If all else fails, stick a pencil in your mouth"

No, really. This was one of the things I did regularly when I was learning how to manage my depression. Here is how it works:

Your muscles send messages to your brain, which in turn governs your emotions by releasing different chemicals. So if you can't seem to shake that frown and smiling seems like the last thing on earth you could do right now, fake it.

Stick a pencil between your back teeth as far as is comfortable and keep it there for a couple of minutes.

Muscle position seem familiar? It's because you are 'smiling'.

Pretty soon your brain will release endorphins because it can't tell the difference between a smile-by-pencil or smile-by-general-feeling-of-happiness. 

This is the right way to stick a pencil in your mouth:

See the similarity?

 This is the wrong way to stick a pencil in your mouth:

Sweet.

Happiness

Depending on whether or not I get this assignment finished, tomorrow I will start a 10-part daily series of ideas to keep happy. I had a lady speak to me about these last week and I found them to be a good reminder to be kind to myself. Especially helpful if you are in a position where you give out to a lot to other people, and not much to yourself. 

Don't fret. It will not be rubbish advice. As a teaser, let me say pencils, sex and salmon are involved.

Enough said. Let's get this assignment done.

Called

Called.

The word is featured on a wallpaper issued by some way-cooler-than-me ministry in the USA and oh, how I loathe it right now.

It hasn’t always been cause for loathing, in high school when I was stuck playing French Horn, I would have given my left arm to know I was called by God to do something grand. Not my right, just my left arm.

But how times change. God lures us in with all the perks of the job, not dental or good holidays and pay rate, but the infinitely more desirable notion that we could do something that would matter, and make a difference. We could play the melodies of our lives in time with Him and make music that doesn’t fade once it hit our ears, but echoes eternal.

Now I understand why He didn’t mention the other parts we would be playing together. The parts about leaving family and friends to do what He calls us to. The parts about taking up your cross (still working on getting the courage to look at the thing). I no longer have the freedom to play what I want or only when it is convenient for me. I have to play parts that are hard and parts that are faster, slower, more risky than I would have preferred. He asks me to play in a symphony when I want a duet, or worse, a solo. Sometimes I sit there in my dissonance and wonder what else He isn’t telling me about...

But He is clever, our God. So clever. The melodies I hear now aren’t something that would have enticed me 5 years ago, but I wouldn’t abandon the call just to get rid of them. I have actually come to find comfort in them. No one else but God is a constant when my heart is in angst, no one else’s love is so clear when I cry out in pain. When my song starts to lose heart and go out of tune, there is my God, gently pulling the strings of my heart tighter, tuning me so that I sound good with the composer and all that He intends for me to be.

Called.

His song with me isn’t finished, but He has plans and as long as He is with me, I will continue to be tuned and played and called.

Spam

This came through my junk mail filter today:

Sender: Godeste Hara 

Date: 27/08/2008 16:50

Subject: Double the size of your organ easily